daisy's the designer. pictures owned by designer.
forgotton the origin of brushes, sorry. please notify me if you know where it come from. thanks.
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Midnight Train.
Awesome version of the song. (: Super nice acoustic feel to compliment the actual lyrics.
Work is alright....I'm surviving it. (: I hope I get a huge ass payload next month. But I am guessing that's not possible.
Picnic with the comperes people tomorrow. Meeting for CASS day tomorrow. Everything tomorrow. Wonder when I will have time to really get started on my essays. ED and ESAD. OMG AND I STILL HAVE ESAD journals. :/ FML. I'LL DO IT EVENTUALLY!!!!!! RAWR!!!!!
Alrighty then, ciaomenz. Till the next time I post!
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
2nd Hand FINA Auditorium Guitar.
This is my new acoustic guitar.
I still have the black Vantage acoustic with me. So, I am wondering if I should sell it off or keep it. I need the money but the value of it is quite high on my list. A black guitar is awesome to look at. XD
Tomorrow is work from 12nn - 10pm. OMGosh. I hope I survive it. Sigh...I need to GET MY PAY!!!!! Calculated amt: $201, Expecting: $180+ only. Cuz I keep cutting hours. My last shift was 6.05hrs. I don't even know what that means, do I get .05hrs worth of pay? o.O??
I WANT ANOTHER JOB. I need a change of environment alrdy. Lol...F&B gets boring. But for now, I think I'll stick around white dog. Starting to do a BIT of bar duties, like pour beer. :P FUNNN...except for the fact that it is beer. Hmm...
Project Yum! 3 is gonna take off on the 23rd & 24th June, The Visit. It's gonna be an awesome production so DO CATCH IT!!!! It is at NAFA, tickets are going at like $25...lol, a bit of promotion.
Moving on, I watched Toy Story 3 with Lucas, Shaun, Ben Khoo and Ke Li today. Quite a nice movie. It kind of touches the heart strings when you grow up watching these toy story movies. And you feel like your favourite toy or your favourite hobby should not just fade away as your grow up. I mean it is hard to carry it with you but you can always pass it on to someone who would take it on. (: Awesome movie. 4/5 cuz I got a buzz lightyear cup thingy!!!! :P
Alright dighty, time to shove off to my work! Ciaoz peeps.
Friday, June 18, 2010
Please HATE me.
"According to Leroy:
I am NOT allowed to be upset in any way or form, neither am i allowed to outwardly show any example of negative emotions, even if they are not target at him. Forced smiles aren't allowed either, because i have to be TRUE and 100% HAPPY when i'm around him. If not, he'll get irritated, and count it as instance of argument with him, even if it had nothing to do with him whatsoever, and use it back against me as reasoning and justification to fuck me up and over. .
Oh and my depression? So nooooo excuse! It must be DEALT WITH IMMEDIATELY! One month, and you say more time? Well then i say good-BYE! ): .
I am also to be be polite, sweet, and mature, and accept any shit he gives to me, because apparently he's 18 and that gives him the right to be immature. .
And because my ideals are different from his, they are therefore outdated and old-fashioned, and should be discarded or be counted as worthless. Because he's the most of up to date person EVER, and his views are echoed by everyone else around the world! I'm the guy from the "Romantic Era". I'm like a couple of hundred years old fashioned, ZOMG!!! D: I should have known care and concern for friends was dead, and all people want is just "someone easy to talk to". By that justification, he pretty much claimed that i ain't his best friend anymore too i suppose, so, OKAY! Because in his opinion, "best friends" are people he(namely everyone but me too!) can talk to easily, and since i'm not on his list of those kind of people now, i should be by default, no longer his "best friend" (: .
I guess my idea of a best friend should change to follow his as well too huh? My definition of a best friend, that is a person i would give even my life to protect, is wrong, so OKAY to that too! I'm just old fashioned, right? (: Its nothing! Its meaningless! No one else gives a shit about those kind of things anymore, so i shouldn't bother. Thats what he says, so thats what i'm supposed to do. Because his view is omnipotent, and mine is just that of a insignificant gnat :D .
So using that view of "being easy to talk to = best friend", i should be below since i don't even talk to Leroy anymore. And random people around him are all his besties for life! Good to know (: In fact, when i DO try to talk to him, he goes "You so irritating!~~". Like, wha? Ok, so i can't say this, i can't say that, .... Wait, nothing left for me to say? Okay, but why are you telling me what specific topics to talk to you about now? I don't know, is it really normal to set ground rules for conversation between friends? You mean i can only talk about trivial stuff? But i thought you hated gossip and stuff like that? No? Its just me then? Okay, maybe i should just shut up and sit here quietly then :/ .... Wait, even me being here, barely noticable to you in the corner, irritates you now? I'm doing something wrong? Oookay... .
Did you jump for joy and celebrate when i suggested this break, Leroy? =D Did you think "OMG, GOOD RIDDANCE! WOOHOO!"? Its such a chore just to have me in your presence, isn't it? But why do it then? By try to be my friend? ): .
Oh... So you're not really being my friend? You're just doing it to your own benefit, so others can see you in a better light? You're afraid people would judge you if something were to happen to me? o.O Okaaayy... .
Dear Leroy. Its only been 2 days, but i can honestly say i hate you now (: This mark you left on me and never washed away, is a festering wound, threatening to spread. And i welcome it, with open arms. :D
Your words, the ones that spoke of care and concern, while they might not be lies before, but are now such. The past is the past, like you always say. Never expected me to consider throwing the good things in that pile too, did you? Good or bad, past is the past then.
Never before have i felt such loathing, such anger and fury. I want to punch you. I want to hit you. I want to kick, scream, yell at you. I want to make you feel every single bit of agony you put me through. Every word. Every emotion. I want to throw it at your face. Only then will i be sated.
Maybe its true. Maybe i do need to isolate you into a corner with every issue i've ever had, and dump it together into the sea, with you as its anchor. But no. I have other plans. I have much to set in motion.
You said you would try to be my friend. You said you would prove yourself to me again. To earn back my trust. You said so many things. So many times. And for what? What is this for? A joke? A free drama serial? Or maybe to add in your "resume for life experiences"? TO boast about to others, perhaps? Show that you're such a "sweet and caring" person? Hahhahaha.
This break? I wonder what you'll do with it. Would you use it to think of better ways to handle this situation? Or would you toss the opportunity aside, once again, because you had "better and more important" leisure activities to attend to? I know in my mind which one you'll choose. Its always the same with you. Never have you ever sought to prove me wrong either.
Go, have fun and relax, this one's on me, or rather at my expense. Go do whatever frivolous stuff you want to do, i don't give a fuck. Next week, we'll see. Next week, i'm settling this. All it takes is a week. And we'll see how much we've both let this wound fester."
.
Hate me. I am that horrible person. Word FOR WORD. Honestly.
I have come to a realization
Sigh, I don't know if I should feel terrible or just discard this. I'm lost. I fucked up as a friend. What this person says is the truth. I will not deny anything. I'm a shithole.
This is it.
This person is a good friend of mine I've known for the last 6 years. He knows me well enough. And so I am this person. I ain't a saint. I ain't a christian. I'm human. I err. I kill.
Moral reasoning will be the eventual death of humanity.
Camp is over!!!!
WHOO HOO!!! SPARC-Comperes FOC was indeed wonderland. (: All 4 days were super fun packed and awesome. Glad the campers enjoyed it. I managed to spend a lot of quality time with the freshies of comperes and SPARC, which is always a good thing. I feel that the comperes this year are full of heart and they are pretty open minded and flexible. Which is a good thing. And the SPARC juniors are rather fun people to talk to but they prefer working their minds than their bodies. :P That's what I think anyway. hehe~~I <3s them all the same. COMPERES ARE THE WINNER FOR JACOB's LADDER this year!!!!! WEEEETTTTSSS!!!!!
So anyway, I am feeling quite lost and disorientated after camp. A normal thing to feel. But my schedule is suddenly empty with cancellations here and there. I kinda feel like the world is forcing me to slow down and stop. Although I don't really like it, maybe I should take this time to rest up and reflect. Getting started on my essays is a good idea too.
Went to watch Karate Kid with Lucas and Co. today. It was a pretty predictable movie. Hahaha, teaching a kid kungfu by making him put on and take off his jacket. XD Seems interesting.
Sigh, I don't feel like blogging much now.
Here is some RHCP for ya'll to chew on. (:
Saturday, June 12, 2010
Women on Nice Guys...
I found this video today. Quite interesting for any "nice guys" out there. (:
Her name is Kezia. Hahaha, explanation on why nice guys just don't cut it. And why girls who are younger go gaga over jerks. Do note, Nice guy =/= Good guy. Lol...
Hahaa, I woke up late today for my test. Ergh...-.-'' SUCKS!!!!
Alrighty, that's my bit for the day. And to those who wonder why I post videos? CUZ I DON"T HAVE A CAMERA FOR PHOTOS!!!! RAWR. So. Get me one. (: hehe~
Thursday, June 10, 2010
Dear dream...
Hi dream miester, you are a mean man. You spin tales in my mind when my eyes are closed and I am blind to everything else. You play with colours and images, movement and size. The storyline doesn't need to have a plot, it just needs a line which leads into the story. You are a mean mean man, bringing me from the clutches of heaven to the depths of hell. Dream miester, I wonder what you could ever do for me. Would there be a dream that would come true? Or a nightmare that would make me get ensnared? Your latest creation has left me forsaken. Wondering, if dreams are good to all. They all say, wish upon a star and may your dreams come true. There are some dreams that are too good to be true. Yet these dreams are sometimes so realistic and repetitive that it haunts you. Why do you have to dig up a buried desire? Dream miester, you are either an inspirational man who wants to see the world have its desires or a cold hearted tyrant who doesn't consider the context upon which you torture. But after all is said and done. I can't deny it.
My heart aches after my desire.
I wish I had forgotten. I thought I had forgotten. Amongst the wonderous things around me. You'd think it easy to forget a person. Someone who isn't even remotely near. Someone who is almost, save for the shrinking world, unreachable. Why. Can't. This. Emotion. Die. WHY? I have so much going for me. I have great friends and a good path of education going on for me. But why? Why do I still feel that a part of it is missing. And even so, we all know. That given my desire, I would have no idea how to handle it. Pure and simple. I hate the presence of that name, yet yearn for its owner. Lunacy is getting to me.
Well, my letter to you is as far as this. I hope you have a pleasant evening at work dream miester. You decide, on this young night, to let me be or torment me with the most precious image in my mind.
Leroy
"I know you,
I walked with you once upon a dream"
I know you,
I looked in your eyes within that dream.
Wow, this is energetic...not very impressive, but energetic.
Saturday, June 5, 2010
CRAVING DRIED MANGOES...
OMG I AM SO CRAVING DRIED MANGOES AND I AM FEELING FAMISHED. I WANT FOOD. Lol.
But besides that. This week has been a whirlwind. School, work, school, work, school, more work...etc. (: Tomorrow will be my last work shift before my 2 weeks BREAK from F&B work. Thank God. And oh, if anyone is looking for a part timer and is willing to pay at least $6.50/hr without anything to do with F&B PLS CONTACT ME. I need to get out of this dead end job.
Hahaha, singing tips in yo' face.
Mann...I wanna learn how to sing nicely. :/ Vocal lessons are exp...and I have PFA which the voice is for. OMG....SO STRESSED! And IEP is next week along with my IHP paper. LOL...good game.
